This is an interesting article on creating a family culture while working.
Note: I found this was more realistically four servings.
Finishing this dish with lime zest and juice brightens its rich flavors.
Yield 6 servings (serving size: about 3 ounces ribs, 2/3 cup rice, and about 2 1/2 tablespoons sauce)
With Each Goodbye, You Learn
Happy Birthday Gorgeous!
Oh God, Book One
Curried Beef Short Ribs
Black Bean-Taco Salad with Lime Vinaigrette
baby #2 (18)
baby tips (8)
brat stuff (6)
handling divorce (23)
pregnancy #2 (44)
Fifteen months and 11 days ago Keegan came into our lives. At first when it came to sleeping I just did whatever worked. Because I was nursing he was in a cradle in our room and sometimes in our bed too. Around three months I transitioned him into the crib and his own room. He was never a great sleeper but atleast everyone had their own space. A few months after that he got sick, was back in bed with me and then had a hard time going back to his space. When I went back to work and he hit daycare he was sick every week. I needed sleep and he needed sleep. So I chose the lesser of two evils and he ended up in bed with me. The months passed and we came up with a routine out of necessity. Along the way we did develop a regular night routine and bedtime but never got him back in that crib. My goal then became to wait until after his ear surgery to start a plan of action. I read books, consulted with other mommies and procrastinated like a kid in college. I had a convenient excuse every week to put off implementing the plan. I know it's not Keegan's fault, it's mine. I didn't teach him how to go to bed and how to soothe himself at night. This past week became do or die week for the plan.
I selected Wednesday night for the first night of the Sleep Shuffle.
I have to tell you that night was hell. He cried and I cried. I held him on the edge of the crib and apologized for not giving him the necessary skills to sleep without distress. He stood up and wailed and held out his arms and I was dying. I got him to lay down and he cried while I rubbed his back. I sat by his crib with my arm through the slats until his breathing slowed. I knew I had to stick to my goal of not picking him up and eventually (an hour of crying total) he went to sleep. I woke around 1:30 and he wouldn't stay asleep so I slept on the floor in a sleeping bag. He woke quite frequently but I was able to just talk to him and he would go back down. I got short bursts of sleep through that early morning.
Last night was a dramatic change. He went to sleep within 15 minutes with minimal crying. He woke at 2:30 and wasn't crying but called out to me. I went into his room, hugged him briefly and then lay him back down. I sat next to the crib and he watched me for about ten minutes until his eyes closed. I stayed in there reading a book and then went back to my room (45 minutes total). He didn't wake up again until we woke him this morning! I slept in my bed and he slept in his!!! I know we'll probably slide backwards a little before we get this worked out but I am so thrilled with the progress. Thank you light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you Sleep Lady. Thank you sheer stubborn will.
Yesterday I went to the bookstore in search of resources to help with our non-crib sleeping baby. I had a tip from some other moms about two books. I was able to buy Kim West's book but the second one, a no cry approach especially for toddlers, wasn't available yet.
I noticed that they have those theft deterrent gateway things before you could use the restroom. Smart. That should alleviate that whole "bathroom book" issue (ala George Costanza).
Now I just need to find time to read the book in order to come up with a plan. Of course it may mean less sleep in the interim but atleast it will give me hope. Sometimes that's all a tired mommy needs.
The shopping cart cover can be found here. Plus it is from New Hampshire!
"the single greatest predictor of infant adjustment is maternal mental health. In other words, to put it more scientifically, if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. So do whatever it takes to be happy."
Big discussion going on about people telling others how to be good mothers. I can not say anything that hasn't beeen said more eloquently by others but I really liked that quote. Sums it up nicely. As much joy as I felt when Keegan was born I was very sensitive to any symptoms of post-partum depression. I wanted to make sure that I would be able to tell others if I needed help. Fortunately I was okay but I also knew my limitations and what I needed to do to maintain my mental health. And when I didn't, the people I loved insisted on it. My pediatrician's office now screens for parental depression at all child appointments. I think it is an idea long overdue.
I have lots of strong opinions about mothering (and many other topics) too. I didn't make any do or die decisions about breastfeeding, cloth diapering, etc. until I was there actually doing it. Everyone's experience is unique. I would never deem to tell someone else what to do. I try to only give solicited advice. Well unless it is for family and close friends, then I butt right in. But they already know this about me.
For new mommies & daddies:
The first few weeks are extremely challenging. Do not feel guilty or like a bad parent if you cry and get frustrated. This is a healthy release.
(Friends and family of new parents: Don't ask if they are getting any sleep. Of course they aren't and you are just rubbing it in.)
It takes about 8 weeks before you get your "sea legs". This is also when your baby will be more active and fun to watch.
At ten weeks you will feel competent to handle daily tasks. Take advantage of this new found confidence to get out in the world.
Here is some wisdom (ha,ha) from a very new mom:
Best products so far:
Pack N Play Bassinet (conveniently setup in our bedroom to make diaper changes accessible)
Boppy Pillow (the best for postioning for breastfeeding)
Hobbit Breast Shells (for giving those sore ones a break)
Medically pure lanolin (see above)
Bravado Nursing Bra (especially good for us larger gals)
Breastpump (hospital gave me hand one and I bought unit to make it electric)
Get this book, "The Nursing Mother's Companion", before you deliver. It would have helped me immensely.
Make a nest; pillows for back, foot stool, table setup with water bottle, lip ointment, notepad to keep feeding & changing log, burp cloths, breast pump, breastpads
Also make sure you have atleast three of everything (one to use, one in wash, one on standby). I had this problem with nightgowns and quilted waterproof pads. It helps if you have a mom willing to run around and shop for you.