My new staff member was cleaning out the files in what used to be my office. She found an email I sent Tom on June 3, 2005.
"I just wanted to tell you that I am sad that this is the last week we will ever live together. I will miss seeing and talking to you every day. Although we have had some rough times, we had some really good times too. You've been my friend for 11 years and I will miss that. I can not forget all of the things that we supported each other through and all of the hurdles we tackled as a couple. Thank you for loving me, for taking a leap with me and for giving me Keegan. You are a good guy with a loving heart and I truly wish you a happy life."
His response:
"You will see me...I hope you remember that.
But thank you, I will miss you a lot too. I will also remember the good times that we shared and a piece of my heart will always belong to you. Thank you for giving ME Keegan. You gave me a lot and taught me a lot and I wish you the best also."
This why I needed to see him one last time, why I needed to help with the arrangements, why I needed to speak at his funeral, why I needed to grieve him. And this is also why I am able to continue to build a life for our son. As long as we live, love lives.
http://www.fillorburst.com/mt-tb.cgi/1229
so so true.
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
Keegan's a lucky kid to have been brought into this world by two people who put their love for him above everything else. The mutual respect and compassion you had for each other even when the marriage was ending amazes me. The ability of two people who are in the process of ending a marriage-to be able to express sadness, thanks, and hopes for them for the future...wow.
As short a time as Tom had with Keegan, I know his influence will be great-and with you in his life, he is going to grow up to be a truly amazing kid-full of love and compassion for others-because children DO learn what they live.
I don't know which has me crying more - your post or Allie's comment.
It's sad that we can't always make marriage work out.