about
Alisa. 37. New Hampshire. Married for almost three years to this wonderful, funny, smart guy. Previously married. Went through in-vitro fertilization to have my five year old magical son Keegan. Stepmother to the charming Isabelle (6). Gushingly in love with our baby boy Harper(1). Policy Wonk and dreaded bureaucrat. Lover of fine cuisine, honeybees, truly romantic moments and the underdog.
cooking
Curried Beef Short Ribs

Note: I found this was more realistically four servings.

Finishing this dish with lime zest and juice brightens its rich flavors.

Yield 6 servings (serving size: about 3 ounces ribs, 2/3 cup rice, and about 2 1/2 tablespoons sauce)

2 teaspoons canola oil
2 pounds ...continue reading

view all my recipes

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Germ Warfare

I am really having guilt issues. Specifically with daycare. I think it is a great facility and Keegan definitely likes it there. But the place is a germ farm. Not that it is my center specifically but all centers. Keegan has been sick since the day he started. Every time we conquer something, he gets something else. We had finally turned the corner on both the cold and the ear infection. Then yesterday I picked him up tired but not cranky. He proceeded to refuse dinner and then just cry and fuss. He wouldn't even take a bottle. I thought maybe it was teething or over tiredness. But he couldn't settle down at all even in my lap, which always works. I finally had to walk around with him to get him to sleep, but as soon as I stopped he would wake up and cry. This went on the enitre evening with Tom and I switching off. Then I got ready for bed and brought Keegan with me. He woke up every half hour until 1 am. Then he agreed to drink two ounces and went back to sleep. He continued to wake up and be restless but atleast he didn't cry. Tom and I decided to send him to daycare today because he didn't have any other symptoms except a runny nose. Sure enough at 10:45 they called me at work to say that his temp was almost 101 and that we should come get him. I sent Tom to get him and made an appointment to take him to the doctor later.
There are so many factors here. I don't want Keegan to be sick all the time. I am completely fried because I don't get break in the evenings or any decent sleep. I am brand new at work and so far feel exhausted and bad about needing to take time every week to care for a sick child. But I can't not work. I know that getting sick is something that happens when your child is exposed to other children. And I know that eventually he will build up his immune system. At this point I feel overwhelmed and guilty. And I feel especially stupid because I almost cried at work just thinking about the situation. Luckily I face my cube wall and I was able to pull it together before the tears came. And deep inside is that little voice blaming me for not breastfeeding for a year. My mommy confidence level this week is down in the dumps.

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Comments

I can only imagine how torn you feel about the whole situation. Good luck and your probably right about his immune system becoming stronger in time.

Shared by Daneris at November 17, 2004 1:39 PM

Hang in there...and just remind yourself that there is no guarantee that breastfeeding longer would have helped. I know just as many breastfed kids who get sick just as often as the formula babies-I know research says otherwise, but I think there are more factors that come into play than that. Chin up-and you can pop onto my blog in a few months and give me the pep talk when I'm the one who's back at a new job and trying to deal with a sick kid. I'm scared about how I'll handle the tears in front of a room full of pre-teens...ugh.

Shared by allie at November 18, 2004 5:46 AM

First off, get that guilt for not breastfeeding out of your head! We hear about the medical proof but it's ridiclous to say that Keegen is sick because you didn't breastfeed him.
I feel ya though. I can't take Scottie to my gym's nursery or church's nursery without him waking up the next day with another cold. He's had two colds in the past month and I'm probably going to give him the one I have now. I hope Keegan's feeling better soon!

Shared by BeckiK at November 19, 2004 11:31 AM

Okay, I have to weigh in on this one too. It has NOTHING to do with breastfeeding; I'm convinced of that. Last year was Doodles's first year in day care--and he was sick all the time. Nonstop! And I did breastfeed. But this year, he hasn't been sick at all. "Oh, there's just nothing going around," I said. Except that there's a girl who started in Doodles's room this year... who's been sick like three times already. Always out! It's totally true about their immunity building up. And how lucky are we that our kids have the opportunity to be building their immunity now. 1) We'll feel more confident letting them play with others when we know their immunity is stronger, rather than those kids who haven't been to day care whose parents can be--understandably--fearful. 2) How great that when the get to kindergarten and it starts to "count," they won't be missing days whereas all those kids who didn't go to day care or preschool will be out all the time. Daycare is a great thing (biting aside). Not breastfeeding is a perfectly valid and fine decision. You're doing awesome as a mom, Alisa. Don't forget it!!

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