You ever realized that no matter what we do in life there are some things you go through alone? Tom is as close to me in this as anyone can be. But he can not feel what it is like to carry these embryos inside. To wonder if my body is going to fail me on this one. To know that no matter what everyone blames the woman for infertility problems. I tell you these past few days I thought I knew what to expect. That I would while away the hours waiting until I can find out if I am pregnant. But it has been totally unexpected. The way people have reached out to me. Strangers and friends alike.
I made my daily trip out to the mailbox today. I could see a package hanging tantalizingly from the mailbox. I hoped it was my candles I ordered from Liz and it was. Even the box smelled good and I love the way she always throws in some tarts to try.
But there was more inside the mailbox. A little box from some place called Heaven and Earth in California. I had no idea since I hadn't ordered anything. Inside was a scroll that read, "Thinking of you sis, Scott." Aha something from my brother. I tell you people as I unwrapped those tissue paper forms I had no idea.

There they were. Two botttles of OPI "I'm Not Really A Waitress" nail polish. The sheer thoughtfulness of it brought tears to my eyes. I mean he said that he was trying to stay up on my life lately. He told me he reads every day. But I didn't think he was really soaking it in. But when I needed something from him. Something to show his love here it was. It might sound silly or trivial. Trust me it means alot.