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Alisa. 37. New Hampshire. Married for almost three years to this wonderful, funny, smart guy. Previously married. Went through in-vitro fertilization to have my five year old magical son Keegan. Stepmother to the charming Isabelle (6). Gushingly in love with our baby boy Harper(1). Policy Wonk and dreaded bureaucrat. Lover of fine cuisine, honeybees, truly romantic moments and the underdog.
cooking
Curried Beef Short Ribs

Note: I found this was more realistically four servings.

Finishing this dish with lime zest and juice brightens its rich flavors.

Yield 6 servings (serving size: about 3 ounces ribs, 2/3 cup rice, and about 2 1/2 tablespoons sauce)

2 teaspoons canola oil
2 pounds ...continue reading

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The Whole Story

When I first started to blog I made a promise to myself to only reveal info about family with their permission. I know I would want the same consideration. I talked about this with Tom and he agreed. So far he has been fine with my writing about our infertility. But I haven't yet written about what is also going on with him. A couple of days ago he told me to post about if I wanted to. I decided I wanted to in order to keep a more accurate record of what is going on in my life. This way our friends and family can read any updates here instead of having to wait for phone calls with reports.

Through this infertility process I have felt that we are going through this for a reason. I'm a logical person in most ways and I truly believe that good people get good things. I also believe that bad things happen to good people too and that there is always a way to grow from it if we look closely.
A month ago we began to learn what the reason might be.
My husband hates the doctor. I mean HATES it. He is also amazingly stubborn. The only way he would go to a doctor is in a dire emergency (ie. decapitation) or to help us have a baby. So he begrudgingly accompanied me to our first fertility specialist appointment and was fairly queasy throughout. We knew at that point we had bad news in the sperm department.
We were then sent to Dartmouth Medical Center to see a urologist. He was really great and ran some more tests on Tom. At the time he commented on Tom's unusually dark skin tone. Curious more because Tom works indoors and its the middle of winter. He decided to run an extra test on a hunch.
His hunch paid off and he called to tell us that Tom might have an adrenal problem. We were then setup with appointments with an endocrinologist. So a few weeks ago we went back up to Dartmouth. This doctor was fantastic. Really informative and helpful. He was fascinated by Tom and confirmed that he has Addison's disease. He showed us some classic symptoms which I have never thought were unusual because Tom slowly got more tan over the years. The other thing is that he doesn't have any other symptoms. None. The doctors were amazed.
The next step was to find out if the autoimmune disease was effecting any where else. So earlier this week Tom had a Thyroid scan. They said it is mildly overactive but we will talk to the doctor on Mon to get more specifics. I questioned the possibility of benign tumors but the doctor said they would have to be on both adrenal glands which is almost impossible. But he did decide to order a CAT scan for later this month. Tom is blaming me for that extra test. But we have a sense of humor about it.
He likes to tell me now that he needs to eat extra junk food or he is too weak to do the dishes because of his disease. Funny guy.
We don't know how much this may factor into our infertility and it will take 3-4 months for the sperm to be effected by his medication. We aren't sure if we'll wait or go ahead with other options.
But I can tell you that I have been so proud of the way Tom is handling this. He has subjected himself to many bloodtests, shots, scans, consultations and questions. Not to mention that he will be on medication for the rest of his life. He nonchalantly picked out his Medic Alert necklace and kept on going. We will have to carry an injection kit for emergencies and I will be learning how to give him the shot he would need until we could get medical attention. He has shown me a side of himself I never saw before. We have also grown closer as a couple. I feel like we are facing this as a team. My job is to ask questions, keep up with appointments and push for the best medical treatment. I'm totally in my element with that and he has told me how valuable that is. I know even more now that we can face the infertility journey better as well. So all this so we could find out about his illness in probably the best way possible. As opposed to him suffering through weakness and fatigue and possibly passing out without us having a clue. This has been our gift.

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